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BOOK REVIEW:
WANTING TO BE HER BY MICHELLE GRAHAM
Julie Prindle
Wanting to
Be Her
reveals the “body image secrets Victoria won’t tell you.” Not to
be confused with beauty tricks, this book challenges society’s
beauty image standard, holding it against biblical truth.
The first half of
Graham’s book identifies North America’s definition of beauty,
how the story of women’s self-consciousness is tied to the
biblical story of the Fall, and the damaging consequences of
letting image control one’s life.
The most insightful
of the secrets comes in the middle of the book. It is the secret
of what Victoria doesn’t tell us about beauty and ethnicity.
“Who is the fairest of them all?” the chapter begs. Graham does
an excellent job deconstructing the question. “Many women have
discovered an unspoken addendum to the beauty standards of our
society: The more European one’s features, the more beautiful
one is considered to be,” Graham writes (62). Evidenced
primarily through media marketing, American society answers the
question very specifically. White. Thin. Clear complexion.
Straight, long hair. Trendy. Graham traces this image standard
back through various stages of history: European scientists who
measured dental health standards by the angle of the European
jaw line, slave owners who privileged slaves who had Caucasian
features, pastors who argued that the standard of “beauty” was
determined by Greek sculpture. She shows that philosophers,
pastors, and scientists throughout history have
westernized the
concept of beauty. Graham also shows how this affects the daily
lives of women of various cultural backgrounds. One
Chinese-American woman went to be fitted for glasses and found
that none fit her nose. Women of color have often found they get
better service, or are more likely to be hired for a job, if
they perm their hair and wear clothing styles common to “White”
women.
Although the
misrepresentation of and unreachable expectations on women’s
physicality by culture is obvious, I have never considered the
cultural implications of the American beauty standard before
reading Graham’s book. Rather than valuing its diversity, our
society criticizes it. Graham reveals how North American beauty
standards negate the value of North America’s cultural
diversity. Not only is the standard impossible, it is also
another form of injustice.
Graham closes the
book by discussing how to balance beauty through lifestyle
choices, the source of real beauty: character, and steps for
gaining freedom from unhealthy lifestyle patterns that feed
image obsession. While the first half of the book is more
descriptive, the second half is prescriptive.
As a woman raised in
a suburban Evangelical Christian context, many of the “secrets”
in Wanting to Be Her were not new; the truths in Graham’s
book have been familiar to me since Junior High youth group.
Graham certainly writes from within a Christian subculture. The
content is appropriate for formidable young women fairly new to
faith and longing for a perspective on beauty different from
what is propagated throughout media. Because of this, one ideal
use of the book would be in Junior High small groups. The book
includes group discussion questions, personal ideas for
journaling, and memory verses and is appropriate for those
struggling with the pressures of image, questioning cultural
standards, or simply needing a biblical perspective. It may not
be ideal for those wanting a more objective, less devotional
approach.
Wanting To Be Her: Body Image
Secrets Victoria Won’t Tell You
By Michelle Graham
InterVarsity Press 169 pages
Purchase this book for 25% off at Equality Depot.
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